Why ‘Me Time’ Doesn’t Feel Like Rest
You block the calendar. You light the candle. You try to read the book. And yet—your brain won’t stop buzzing.
A client told me recently:
“I finally got an hour to myself… and I spent 45 minutes scrolling TikTok, feeling guilty the whole time.”
She didn’t need more time. She needed permission to rest without guilt.
And that my friends is the real secret behind “me time.”
It’s not about spa days or yoga retreats. It’s about learning how to rest without turning it into another chore.
Why “Me Time” Doesn’t Work
You’ve heard it a million times: Take time for yourself.
But when you do, it rarely feels like rest.
Three reasons:
Rest guilt. The whisper: “I should be doing laundry instead.”
Productivity creep. Even downtime gets hijacked into “useful” tasks like podcasts, self-help books, or folding towels while watching Netflix.
Unrealistic expectations. Thinking rest should feel magical, when in reality it often just looks like sitting on the couch.
Emma (our dream client) often tells me, “I try to relax, but it doesn’t feel productive, so I end up filling the time anyway.”
And then she wonders why she still feels depleted.
The Cost of Fake Rest
When rest feels like another task, your brain never truly shuts down.
That’s why even after “self-care nights,” you wake up just as tired.
It’s like charging your phone with a frayed cable. The outlet is there, the charger is there — but the power never actually flows.
Why ‘Me Time’ Doesn’t Feel Like Rest
The Fix: Simple, Guilt-Free Rest
Rest doesn’t have to be grand. It has to be real.
1. Name it neutral.
Stop calling it “me time.” Call it “reset time.” Less pressure, less guilt.
2. Shrink the window.
Instead of carving an hour, try 10–15 minutes. Walk outside. Lie down. Close your eyes. Short, repeatable rests beat rare, elaborate ones.
Ditch productivity.
If it has a purpose (learning, folding, achieving), it’s not rest. Rest is useless — and that’s its power.
A Story That Shifted My Thinking
One client kept a sticky note on her fridge: “Rest is useless on purpose.”
At first it made her laugh.
But over time, she said it freed her from trying to make downtime “worthwhile.”
She finally read trashy novels without guilt and oddly enough, felt more energized at work the next day.
Rest Is Useless On Purpose
The Bigger Lesson
Real rest isn’t about what you do. It’s about what you don’t owe.
Emma doesn’t need another planner or ritual.
She needs to believe that sitting on the couch for 12 minutes staring out the window is not wasted time — it’s medicine.
Proverb
“Rest is useless on purpose. And that’s what makes it powerful.”
✨ Reply and tell me: What’s your guilty rest habit?
⭐ Save this for the next time you feel bad about doing nothing.
📩 Share with a friend who treats self-care like a to-do list.
Here’s to finding your flow,
Mia
